There is nothing wrong with you. Seriously.
We start this journey of self-improvement because we want a better life for ourselves. Our current life situation doesn’t satisfy us anymore or even causes pain. Commuting to our 9-5 means suffering. Relaxation after a long day at work is the bitter seed of regret.
You’re miserable. I get it. I’ve been there not long ago. And luckily I managed to get out of this self-help depression.
Here’s how to save weeks if not months of your precious time.
Start by dropping all the optimization nonsense. If monetary freedom is your goal focus on starting a business and drop all the other self-optimization disciplines for now. Add these tools later.
Many self-help YouTubers tell you to fix your mindset first. Why? Because it’s easier to do than to make true change happen.
The main problem with this approach is that your time and will power is limited.
So a better way would be by starting to learn the skills you need in order to build a business, or to get that job – to build the life you want. ‘Fixing’ yourself first is all just procrastination.
I see. You are going to the gym and it feels great. You finally started meditating on a consistent basis and you feel clear-minded. You developed a morning routine you’re proud of and follow like a religious ritual. Here’s the truth.
You’re faking action, IF you aren’t working towards a goal at the same time.
But don’t blame yourself. It’s addicting. You switched your bad habits for healthier ones. Which is great. You can be proud of yourself.
Here’s the question you should ask yourself regularly:
Did I make progress toward my goals this week?
If the answer is no, you’re faking it.
Start by fixing your skillset first. Forget about the judgments of other people for a sec.
Learn how to build your empire and add all the other self-improvement disciplines later on.
Your goal should be to get feedback on your creations as fast as possible. This will increase your willpower and motivation to get better and better.
For whom are we trying to grow our business venture anyways?
To help other people of course because we want them to give us money.
You feel miserable because nobody besides your family and friends is showing you love. Fortunately, there is a way to fix this today.
Start being valuable to other people.
Let the feedback you earn be the motor of your willpower.
Let me tell you my story.
In the last couple of years, I tried to make money online. Well, I’m proud to say that I overcame mental masturbation relatively quickly and started implementing my business ideas. I even made money with web design, translations, and some pennies with Amazon FBA.
I leveled up my business skills after every venture until I was close to launching a drinkable breakfast tasting like coffee (it was delicious) which was already fully developed and marketed. Unfortunately, I failed at financing it. Turns out the internet didn’t like my invention. The product failed with a measly 1000 € in financing (I needed 18.000 € for my first production run).
And I’m grateful for this insight. I learned so much in the process, I have a hard time describing how many lessons I was able to soak in just by trying to build something.
But this journey also left me with scars.
My confidence was at a new low. I thought something was wrong with me. I wanted to fix myself. Because there was obviously something wrong with me right? Why didn’t I become successful despite all the effort?
This was also about the time I discovered the toxic world of self-help on YouTube. Video after video these seemingly well-intentioned YouTubers were trying to tell me I should go to the gym and fix my mindset with meditation or journaling.
I got addicted to this shit badly.
I tried to implement all the good habits I heard of. Which consumed A LOT of time let me tell you. At the same time, I was working full time so all I was doing was working for someone else and going to the gym, meditating, and stuff like that.
I saw the first results of my actions, got compliments from my co-workers and friends. Don’t get me wrong it felt great.
But the realization of how much time passed by trying to ‘fix’ myself made me even more depressed than my failures in business.
I learned all this optimization crap comes AFTER you create something you can be proud of. If you have the desire to be an entrepreneur or your own boss, you’re born to create.
Everything else is a distraction in the beginning. Prioritize what matters truly to you. Forget the judgments of others. You are enough just as you are.
Create, then optimize. And never stop learning.
Cheers!